Content Warning: gore, body image, self-harm, and depersonalization
“See? It's making me whole again. Every drop of blood you spill the more flesh you put on my bones.”
Hellraiser (1987)
I look down at the flesh
that remains
and decide where to cut.
I disassemble my body
until I form
a knotted
cadaver.
I remove my limbs
to lighten
the load, twisting
each arm and leg
off my core like a
mutilated Barbie doll.
I saw my flesh
to the bone,
peeling off layers
until just the frame remains.
I drop my stomach
onto a cutting board
and cleave down
from my ribs. I sharpen
my teeth
to remove the excess
flesh myself,
gnawing the fat off.
An ouroboros abomination:
recycle the old to birth the new.
I pull the skin
on my face taut,
a sharp jaw and cheekbones.
I reassemble my body
until I form
a toothsome
pile of bones.
I look down at the
remains
and decide to cut.